The Three Inner Lives - Female, Woman and Lady
In
the first magazine, I wrote an introduction about the five
dimensions of the female gender.
In this issue and in ones to come,
we will be using different
approaches so that hopefully
a fuller picture will develop
concerning how these lives
affect us.
 This
time, I will be focusing on the first three, which have a
recognisable and specific nature.
They are all interconnected and
even if we are not aware of it,
they influence each other and us
also. The three lives, the female,
the woman and the lady each
have their own world of
experience, intelligence,
expression and timing. They all
look through the eyes of the
person, each reacting in their
own way to what they see. They
influence each other and this can
beharmonious, or full of conflict,
because each of them has their
own agenda.
Life is a great theatre and the way these
lives react with each other, both internally
and with others, is a whole human drama.
Let me introduce you to:
The Three Main Characters
Female
life
The
female life likes to always keep things the same. She represents
the body and
all the accompanying processes. The first
twelve years of life are very important and
this is her primary formation period and
that is why she has such a strong influence.
She has particular needs; including spending
time doing things she enjoys, such
as past times from childhood. When you
were young you may have played a lot
outdoors in nature, read many books, and
loved to dance.
The
female still needs some of these things today and although you
might not go
outside to play, it is more that you need
to be outdoors in nature, breathing in
fresh air, and feeling good about yourself.
The female life starts to rebel and causes
disruption if she does not spend time doing
some of these things she likes. It is important
to find activities that bring some internal
peace and the first place you can look is
at what you loved doing when young, such
as, jigsaw puzzles, writing, drawing, sewing
and so on. Reintroducing them will help
keep some joy and balance in your life.
The female continues to develop over the
years, going through puberty, possibly
childbirth and onto the menopause later,
which causes profound changes. Because
of this, her needs and tastes will alter
according to how her life develops. Oftenthe first years
of life make such an impression,
that certain inclinations, will always
remain an important part of your general
well being.
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Woman life
Next is the Woman life, which comes into
play when puberty commences. She is
adventurous and loves new challenges.
She is full of ideas, initiatives, ideals and
visions and never has enough time to accomplish
them all. Throughout the years she
learns a great many skills, she is the organiser
and manager and in contrast to the
female, who likes to repeat things endlessly,
she loses interest when she has to do things
repetitively.
Lady life
The third life is the Wise Woman or the Lady
and she represents the wisdom, collected
during the years from experiences, bringing
understanding and insight. She is very conscious
of the purpose of life and tries to
weigh up the balances of everything that
happens. She takes into account the needs
of the other two and always strives for the
best results in any circumstance.
The curtain opens, the drama
can begin
When I started working on this issue of the
magazine, I soon found myself in a very live
learning experience involving these three
inner voices.
I had just been through a very intense
and busy time, both personally and work
wise, which had been quite demanding.
Normally, when I need to do some work,
I just sit behind the computer and start.
Usually some ideas come fairly quickly
as I am mostly well disciplined and have
the habit of being able to work when I want
to. This time however, it was different and
resistance to doing the task started rising up.
When I sat in front of my computer, nothing
happened. I tried to put together some intelligent
sentences, but alas, not much came
from my ‘digital pen’ and that which did,
was hardly worth the light of day and was
not very interesting. I just could not think
and at first I could not understand why.
Then…
The woman life started to get irritated
and started marshalling arguments aboutdeadlines, what needed to
be done, and
the fact there was no time to lose, but to
no avail. The only effect this had, was a
completely blank screen. An inner conflict
was going on between the need to work
and needing some time for my female self.
I couldn’t quite give myself the permission
to take time off because of the deadline
I needed to keep.
Eventually
some wisdom started to form up (the lady life came to the rescue).
Throughout the years the woman life
demands a lot of us, and mostly she just
about manages, but constantly drains the
female life by continually running onto the
next project or adventure, without taking
time out. Now it had come to a point
with me that the female life refused to
co-operate and stubbornly refused to work.
She demanded I pay attention and did not
want to be reasoned with. It became clear
that I had to change my way of working
and alter the habits of my woman life.
I had been a very good sprinter, but not
much of a long distance runner and this
approach of doing everything with great
intensity and in bursts, was just too costly.
The wiser part of myself realised that
I needed to work at a different pace so
that some time is left each day for a short
walk or on spending time with friends.
This approach would give me time to
recharge and recover and satisfy some of
the other needs in me, other than the
need to always be at things and doing.
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On
my way to a new harmony
This
new perception, which I have takenon board, has started to
change the habits
of the woman life, by introducing a different
working pattern. It feels a bit strange because
I am not used to this more measured
approach, but it is reaping huge rewards
already. Thankfully my female life is more
satisfied and is therefore more co-operative
and doesn’t interrupt when I do have to
work. Knowing that I will be taking care of
all my inner lives and not just letting the
woman life run the show is quite a relief.
My physical body is now free of the aches
and pains that I used to get, from sitting in
front of the computer for long periods of
time. Pain now prompts me to get up, move
around and take a short break, whilst before
I wasn’t listening.
I am
still managing to achieve all that I need to, but out of this conflict,
greater richness
and harmony has now also been included. The
balance between ‘being’ and ‘ doing’
These
days, because of the pressures we are all under, trying to juggle
work and families
and looking after the home,
there is a risk that we don’t put ourselves on
the priority list and often feel guilty when
we do. But if we don’t, in the long-term we
become less effective and it can lead to
deteriorating health and the feeling of being
burnt out.
It
is important to give these three lives the space they need.
This means regularly
taking time for the female life, by
reconnecting to nature and by doing something
you love doing. Time in which you
only have ‘to be’ and don’t have ‘to do,’and
it is often in these moments that
new perceptions and ideas pop in, which
wouldn’t have had a chance before.
Life is much more joyful when the lives
are working together and don’t have to vie
for attention.
The
lady or wise life has an overview concerning our whole life and
can look much
further ahead. Because of this, if we truly
listen we can always find the advice we
need to lead a more fulfilling life.
This
has been an enormous learning experience and I now feel a greater
sensitivity
towards what is needed. Strangely the often‘
lost’ time is compensated for by the fact
that my woman life is often more effective
and generally I am in a better general state
of well being and herefore have more to
give to others.
Learning
about these three lives, has been a real and important part of
my personal
development and it is quite fun exploring
and understanding what is going on and
I am more respectful than ever of the life
I have been granted. |
